Inspirations From Our Moms

This week I decided to go a bit on a different route. I asked a question to random women: how has you mom inspired you, or the other way around? Take sometime today and ask yourself and your siblings, what inspirations from our moms did we have?

I believe mothers always want the best to their kids, but what they are able to provide will be limited by what they have to give. I’m not talking about providing financially. I’m talking about what they teach, what they model, what they inspire and empower us to be.

Some moms’ experience expand from the desire to provide more to their kids. For others it’s harder to overcome their own generational barriers. For some daughters, they perceived it as a lack of inspiration, which is probably short-sighted (I explain below).

Mother’s Day is coming up (at least here in the US and some other parts in the world) and I want to dedicate this post to my mom and all moms out there.

Inspiration Goes Both Ways

I believe the inspiration goes both ways. Even though the traditional thinking is that parents teach their kids, the truth is moms (when open to it) also learn and get inspired by their daughters.

On my first round, I asked what women did that inspired their moms. Then I figured out I didn’t even know if I had a story like that. So I asked my mom. To my surprise, she told me my love of travel made her also want to travel more. And travel more she did! Here’s a picture of my beautiful mom visiting me in NY in 2008 (oops, she blinked!). She then proceeded to visit a bunch of other places I haven’t even been to yet… I’m still playing catch up!

So I decided to also ask a second round: what has your mom done that inspired you? Then, the responses came fast!

The Trends

This was not an official research, just stories I collected about inspirations from our moms, but I’ll split them into two main categories. Some were moving and a tribute to their moms, some were a declaration of breaking apart with old patterns that no longer serve us.

The Inspiring Examples

The first trend was: she was supportive of me, inspiring, and a terrific example. Some of these moms blew me away.

Such as this declaration from Britney Wolfe:

When I was a teen, my mom gave me freedom most teens don’t have. I told her what I was doing and she had my back. “Mom, I need a note, I’m not going to ‘insert class’ today” She would write me the note. Not because she was careless, but because she trusted me. I never failed a single class, and because I was free I made sure I didn’t skip anything that I wasn’t strong in. My mom empowered me, by trusting me.

No matter what I decide, her response is, I have your back, my girl, whatever you decide I will support you.

When she doesn’t agree with what I’m doing, she will tell me, and she will tell me why… but it is always followed with “but I will always support whatever you decide.”

Britney, I don’t think I could do that to my kid, so your mom certainly knew she could have that trust in you!

And Cara Marrero’s (your mom rocks and we should all take her example):

My mom prioritizes volunteer service and has instilled the principle of community service in me. I love that she took my sister and I everywhere she volunteered from animals shelters to personal care facilities!

How about Gina Morton’s mom, who used positive affirmations that stuck with her? (Please tell her I love her)

The littlest comments she would make have stuck with me. Like, “you are so lucky with money” “things come easily to you” “you look like you belong here” (in reference to a fancy department store. All of these have to do with money for some reason but that’s where I was most insecure within my family as a child.

Anne Therese’s mom is an example not only to her daughter but on parenting goals:

She always let me run my crazy ideas without giving me rejection or pushback. Many times I would go full force into something with passion, only to realize that maybe it wasn’t exactly what I wanted to do after all, and she’d always say “yeah I thought so, but I wanted you to figure it out for yourself.” The way she always believed in me even when she didn’t think it was the best idea, how she let me do my thing and try out life the way I was supposed to, has led me down a path of multiple successes and growth. I’m so grateful to have her as my mother and best friend!

The Short Inspiring Examples

These shorter (but worth mentioning) just demonstrate how often we get those good mom lessons:

“To always be grateful for what I have…”
“By always being a go getter! I’m inspired by that! She always gets it done no matter the circumstances”
“Inspired me to study and keep moving forward even when it seemed hard and the conditions weren’t ‘perfect’.”
“She listened to my wild and crazy dreams, and always believes in me!”
“Stand tall and never back down from a challenge”

The Opposite Inspiring Examples

This was the second trend. Yes, some people responded with comments such as: “To never be like her!”, “Unfortunately, my Mother wasn’t inspiring…” and “By wanting to be completely different than her”.

But, in my opinion, these examples worked as inspirations just as well. My beautiful mom included, who decided she was going to stay home and take care of her daughters full time. I knew from early on that this was an example that, though it made her happy (and make many moms happy), was not for me! I always wanted to be financially independent. 😄

Best Use of an Opposite Inspiring Example

Carla Crivaro’s (who has a super inspiring IG account, you can follow her here) story is how I see the power of getting inspiration from even the example you don’t want to follow, and take it as far as you dream into a positive direction:

To take responsibility for myself. I facilitate self-healing for women from childhood wounds. My mother blames everyone and everything for when she makes mistakes. Which distances her from others. As a parent I didn’t want to parent like her. Initially I felt a lot of resentment towards her for my wounds and mental health. Now on my self-healing journey I’ve taken control of my life, respond better to situations. I don’t resent her now as the path I’m on to support others is beautiful and humbling and I wouldn’t be on it if it wasn’t for her. Now I just see her acting out from her own place of wounding. That her ego, to keep her safe, stops her from connecting with others at an intimate level. I wish I could help her. But to heal, you need to want to.

You’re so right! We can only help those who want to be helped. And we are the ones that need to take the first step on our roads to a blissful life. We can get guidance, but no one else can take them for us.

I want to thank everyone who participated (feel free to share this with your mom!)

If you replied and I didn’t put your comment here, it’s for no other reason than me getting overwhelmed with responses; but feel free to message me on Facebook – thanks!